Jeff was born on January 23, 1983 in Springfield, VT. He is survived by his girlfriend, Steffanie Perham, two children Rylee Alan Blodgett, 11, and Natalie Ann Blodgett, 18 months, and their family pet, Duke all of North Walpole. His father, Alan Blodgett and his wife, Joanne “Jo”, Jeff’s loving step-mother of Charlestown, his mother, Barbara Collins and her husband, Steve of Springfield, VT; a sister, Jennifer Stickney and his brother-in-law, Scott Stickney of Lempster, NH, a sister, Sarah and brother, Samuel Collins both of Springfield, VT; his maternal grandparents, Jim and Patricia Mitchell and his paternal grandparents, Gene and Leona Blodgett of Florida and Richard and Peggy Paskerta of Charlestown. He is survived by many cousins and other family members as well as many close friends whom he adored. Jeff was outgoing, loving, caring and always worked hard to provide for his family. A loving father of two wonderful children Rylee “little man”, and Natalie, “little princess” or Nat. A brother who was loved and who loved back and was always there. A genuine person whom was loved by all. We will miss him always, love him forever and never forget the great human being he was. Jeff was a man no one could hate, a person who was loved by so many and who touched all of our hearts in so many ways.
He enjoyed driving his convertible with the music blaring as he rolled down the streets of our towns. He enjoyed fishing, hunting, camping and has taught his son to enjoy some of those same things which drew them so close.
We will sadly say our goodbyes to this beautiful person far too soon, please join our family to pay your respects to this beautiful person at the Charlestown Memorial Chapel on Thursday, September 8th from 5 to 7 PM.
A graveside service will be held in Oakland Cemetery in Springfield, VT on Friday, September 9th at 2 PM. A reception will follow in the Charlestown VFW.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to his children’s Gofundme account or contribute to their trust fund at Claremont Savings Bank. Please call Claremont Savings Bank for more details. Funds for the children will go towards what they need and will help in their futures. Jeff always wanted the best for his children and we will all come together to ensure we carry on his wishes.
(Click on photo to enlarge)
I'm a writer, so I write. But there are times when no words can even describe the chaotic pain of pure heartbreak. Today is that day. But I'm going to try. I got the call no parent wants to get in the middle of the night. It was from the father of my oldest son telling me our son was critical and it didn't look good at all, yes... heroin. It's the worst sight ever seeing your child hooked up to life support and totally unresponsive, no "Hey Ma" nothing, nothing but the beeping of all the equipment that prevents you from holding your child to your heart. All I could do was lay my hand on his bare shoulder. So I did. This morning at 4:10 am my oldest son Jeff, left this world, ironically on Labor Day weekend. I felt him leave his body and within 5 minutes his heart beat it's last beat. I watched my white hand print of his bluish skin fade and disappear as he did. So now I sit here looking at his last message to me and in closing he said "So till next time, love ya." So until next time my baby boy, there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of you, a moment when I didn't love you with all my heart, and I will see you again... next time.
As I sit reflecting on the life of my oldest son, I go back in my mind to his birth. He was born at 1:23 am on 1/23/83. 1,2,3 sounds like a march, a rhythmic beat. This child of mine had never quite mastered that "common" marching beat. I guess you could say he marched to the beat of his own drum. And I applaud that now as I promote individualism, but when he was young he struggled to fit in with most things, other peers, school, etc and that was quite a challenge for young, first-time parents... His will was strong, and I always had the feeling he didn't feel like he fit in this world. We all go thru periods where this happens but for Jeff it seemed like his entire lifetime. He was easily influenced by things, his peers, society, the material world, and he grew up "needing" a lot, to help fill some kind of void maybe. Impulses were very prevalent in his life and it caused him to make choices that to the rest of us seemed not thought out or like he wasn't using common sense at the time. I guess everyone's idea of "common sense" will be different. If you're marching to the beat of your own drum, that beat will be your own. When the influence from drugs came into his life it was at a time of huge transition for him as we had just moved back to Springfield from living in Massachusetts for three years and he was now a teenager being thrown back into a different school system. That's not easy for all kids to adjust to and when they're struggling inside it's even harder. I know this myself because I attended three different high schools. Drugs seem to find their way to the kids who need to escape this reality or numb themselves to it so they don't feel it hurting them anymore. Sadly, they don't realize that their reality gets even more painful the more they use drugs to try and escape it. My son kept saying he "just wanted to feel good." For a mother looking back at her adult child's life, I see things that I would "feel good" about if I were in his shoes but things aren't always so obvious. I saw a man who at times, worked out like a competitive body-builder, ate the right foods to fuel his body, he could tell you everything about every supplement that you could use to better your health and then there's, heroin. All that work he put into fixing the outside of his body the way he wanted it but poison into the veins that nurtured it. "Feeling good" just took on a whole new meaning and priority in the life of an addict. Everything you created that was good and wonderful in your life is now in the shadows of this monster drug and in one desperate hour of needing to feel good so many lives are flipped into the worst chaos imaginable.
My memories today seem to be pre-selected for me, while I'm trying to recall good ones with my son, mostly the baby years...I'm being shown some things from his adult life that are putting some of the puzzle pieces together. Here I was driving along, listening to Yelawolf sing Till It's Gone, with these lyrics jumping out at me and taking on a while new meaning...
I thought of all the times he got into legal jams and I had to distance myself in every way as hard as it was, emotionally, mentally and physically no matter how much I loved him I couldn't bail him out of his troubles because I knew it would enable him to keep coming to me for help. Sadly, that was the only time I heard from him...but I get it all now. He had the pride of a fighter for his cause but maybe the fight was something he didn't understand yet and I didn't understand his cause either. So as harsh as those lyrics sound, I know there's also love behind of them as parents don't want our kids struggling but they do need to find their own place in this cruel world, some never do sadly.
His movie preferences popped up while I was driving my youngest son to school this morning, and at first I wondered why, then when I saw the compilation of movies and the common theme it all clicked into place. The movie Southpaw came up and a few other fight movies. I think we all gravitate to movies, books, poems, anything that touches something deep within us, a hit to the feels and a common shared experience. If we can relate it to our own life in some way it's almost like it was designed specifically for us. Myself, I never got into fight movies, sat thru a few, felt the feeling of victory the actor felt and understood his plight, but the violence just did something to me I guess. If someone relates to struggling, fighting their way though life then I'm sure these movies would feel encouraging to them. Maybe women feel the warrior spirit in a different way, a more emotional one without the violence. My son said he cried like a baby while watching Southpaw, and I watched it, I saw why. Jeff connected with that masculine image of a warrior who won his battle with life on a deep level because of his own struggles. The fight to be something, to fit in and be acknowledged.
1 comment:
I am so saddened to hear about this.....RIP Jeff and condolences to his family and friends.
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